Not making little "K's" into THE big "K"-Working Mother

Today in church, our pastor addressed that as christians we should not make little "kingdoms" into the big "kingdom". He gave a great example of the type of education we decide for our families such as homeschooling, christian schooling, and public schooling. Our pastor made a great point, there are Godly children who are homeschooled, Godly children in the Christian School, and Godly children in the public school! There are so many Christians who want to make this an issue and try to validate why their reason is more "Godly" than the others. Reality is our main focus should be honoring and bringing glory to our Savior, Jesus Christ regardless. This concept relates so well to mom's and whether they should work or stay at home. As you can tell the working mother is very passionate topic of mine, because I live it everyday. I have the best job in the world to be a mom. I am home with my girl by 4:00pm and enjoy over 12 weeks off a year while collecting a pay check. I understand the sacrifices, I understand and difficulty of staying at home and working.

It seems clear that God calls different individuals to different paths in this regard, as He does in other regards, which is why we find healthy Christian women working outside the home, and healthy Christian women as stay-at-home moms. I don’t, however, agree that feelings of guilt necessarily indicate being out of step with God’s plan. Guilt is often the product of our human conventions. There are external social pressure, which can create feelings of guilt, even when they’re living God’s will for their lives. So while guilt can be a powerful indication of right or wrong, it’s always important to pray for wisdom to uncover the guilt’s source.

My next thought is, why are we so worried about absentee mothering when it’s absentee fathering that seems to have hurt us so much thus far. Is the question of whether to work outside the home or stay at home really just a question for women? We seem to have no difficulty grappling with the question of how men can love and nurture their children, while also using their God given gifts outside the home. We’ve, in large part, made this a women’s issue when, in reality, it’s a parents’ issue. A father who works outside the home will need to place special attention on meeting his children’s needs within that context, just as a mother would need to do the same.

So with that, why does it have to be a question of staying at home OR working outside the home that defines the role of a woman? Could a woman not abide in Christ, love others and fulfill her calling doing both? Obviously a woman with a career cannot be at home to “walk along the road” every second of the day with her children when she is at work, (or while the kids are at school), but she can still invest time with her children and be a Godly and loving example to her children. Yet, as a mom who works full-time outside our home, and for whom most of the women in my social circle, feel like God can honor either decision. Its people that have a more difficult time restraining judgment. Loving your neighbor as yourself involves using your God given gifts not just to the betterment of your family, but to the betterment of everyone God’s placed in your life.

As a final thought, I would just like to throw out there that a woman’s contributions shouldn’t be addressed in such defined terms, in the home vs. out of the home. Just as God gave men tools to contribute to the world in small and large ways, He gave women tools to contribute to the world (not their families alone) in small and large ways. We each need to earnestly seek God’s purpose for our lives, woman or man, parent or not, single or coupled.